Apr 12 2010
“I felt he found my letters and read each one out loud”
3:04 AM | Friends | Movie | Music | Life
Friday I got off work early, so I went up to Berkeley and watched How to Train Your Dragon with Wally, Raymond, and Justin. It was a very cute movie. Probably not good enough to be on the top movie list or anything, but certainly very enjoyable and deserved to be watched in the theater. Honestly, I really wasn’t planning on watching it at all, but Johnny kept talking about it on his tumblr and I got curious. I’m glad I watched it though. We were supposed to get dinner Wednesday night, but he totally flaked out on me. I was very disappointed ‘cause I was really hoping to hang out with him, and I was also mad at myself for getting depressed over it. He replied the next day saying he didn’t get my message and set up another time to hang out on Friday. I half-heartedly agreed but honestly I didn’t think it was going to happen. I just don’t get the vibe that he genuinely wants to hang out with me. Since I got off work early on Friday I made plan with Wally, and then he texted me about the dinner. I was tempted to head back down to south bay to go to dinner with him, but staying with Wally just seemed easier. Maybe it’s just not meant to be. Maybe next time. If it’s meant to happen, it will. I guess.
After the movie, we went over to Eric’s place to hang out. He had a little get-together and a bunch of people were over. One of his friends knows card-readings and he was giving everyone a reading. What he said about my reading totally freaked me out. The two face cards were facing each other, so the guy I was thinking about has also thought about me romantically as well, but even though I’m ready for a relationship and I’ve put my heart out there, he’s just not ready for one and there are other things he has to work out first. My prolonged interest in him has also made things a bit awkward between us. I usually don’t believe in or pay much attention to superstitious things like this, but that reads like the story of my life. I was consciously thinking about Johnny, but somehow it sounded more about Wally. I don’t know, and it doesn’t matter. This could be said about any of the boys I liked. I’m always putting myself out there; always too eager while everyone else is being reserved. Things always end up getting awkward one way or another. Or maybe it’s all in my head; maybe I just get way too sensitive over the little things.
The rest of the weekend was a good distractor though. The Davis boys organized a scavenger hunt in downtown San Francisco on Saturday. I met a lot of people there and it was fun walking around Chinatown and doing goofy missions at Union Square. Sunday night was the Mayday DNA World Tour concert. Wes, Wally, Wayne, Mason, and I all got tickets to go months ago. I think Wayne and I were the only two who were really excited about it though ‘cause we actually listen to Mayday’s music, while the rest just got dragged along by us. I was really looking forward to it, since it was my first real big concert. Even though the atmosphere and the crowd were great, it is still a bit underwhelming for me in Mayday’s standard. Perhaps I just had too high of an expectation because of all the live concert DVDs I’ve seen of them. This is a relatively small venue for them after all. I had fun though and I’m certainly glad I went.
Comments
Apr 12, 11:03 AM SilverNeurotic said:
I’ve usually found that when I’m actively seeking a relationship, it just ends in heartbreak. When I’m just being myself and being friendly towards the people around me, I usually end up attracting the interest of someone.
Apr 12, 3:18 PM .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) said:
@SilverNeurotic, I think you’re onto something. I really need to pull myself out and just go back to being me again. Thanks again for the advice.
Apr 12, 8:26 PM Asia said:
I love that song, especially the Lauren Hill version. Are you on Last.fm? Feel free to add me @evitae. (I went ahead and added you. Let me know if I’m being too friendly! I won’t be hurt if you decline me. I added you on deviantART as well.)
I haven’t seen a movie in theaters since Star Trek, so almost a year ago. It was pretty kick ass though. I tend not to attend movies unless I think it’s going to be of that caliber. But ultimately, I find it difficult to dislike a movie (except for anything by Rob Zombie or of a similarly sadistic, twisted nature). I would probably definitely like How to Train Your Dragon! But I usually avoid animated features in theaters.
I’m sorry he flaked on you for dinner. That can be very hard to deal with. I think what you said about “If it’s meant to happen, it will” is very true, yet I don’t know if you should wait around for it. Similar to what SilverNeurotic said, I think love works best when you don’t go looking for it. That makes it sound like you’ll be waiting forever, but going into things that way almost assures that you’ll go into the relationship already friends. In my experience, that makes things go a lot smoother. It’s the hardest thing to fawn over someone you’re not certain wants you back. I don’t necessarily believe in card reading, but it’s certainly something to think about. I think they work because they present us with essentially conventional wisdom.
Glad to hear the rest of your weekend was great though! I want to go to San Francisco one day. New York isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be! I am glad to see that more “foreign” bands are doing tours in the U.S. I think iTunes would benefit by opening music on a worldwide scale! I remember when I became obsessed with Tong Hua and was so disappointed that iTunes didn’t have it at the time. I think there is an interest in a more international market if they open it up! I’ve never been to a “real” concert either.
Anyway, my comment is getting super long. Glad to hear you’re balancing the good times through your troubles. I think you’ll be fine.
Apr 13, 3:57 AM Portia said:
Thanks for the question. The Question & Answer blog should be up in a few days (:
Sorry to hear he flaked out on you, but seeing as he set up another time for Friday it shows he still enjoys your company. At least the rest of your weekend was good though!
Apr 14, 12:22 AM HalfCrazy said:
I wanna watch How To Traing A Dragon too! Especially if it’s in 3D and if it’s worth every penny! But then I think I’m gonna watch Date Night for the next movie trip.
You know, I have only read 2 of your posts but I really like how you are not afraid to put into words what you’re feeling and thinking. That’s awesome.
Apr 14, 7:24 PM Claudine said:
Aww, you watched How To Train Your Dragon? I still haven’t seen it. My niece and I are still hoping to watch it somewhere but I don’t know…
Gosh, I’m sorry about what happened that Wednesday. At least you hung out in another day :D And your weekend was a great one, that’s something to be happy about.
Apr 15, 6:39 PM Meredith said:
You should watch it, it’s such a great show.. I loveeee it.
It really does make us value things more. It just kind of reminds you that you can die even at 18, and we’re not as invincible as we’d like to think.
I kindof want to see how to train your dragon, I just hateee the prices of 3D movies here >.< It’s so expensive just to see a movie.
& that seemed to be the story of my life before, but once you find someone that you love & who loves you back, that will all change <3
Apr 16, 8:05 AM SassyGirl said:
It can definitely get awkward when “crushes” are out in the open, especially if you’ve been crushing longer or harder than the other person. It happened to me earlier this year, and although he liked me too, he was reluctant to do anything about it, so things became awkward between us.
I miss the days of grade-school when you could crush on each other with no expectations. Nowadays, once it’s out in the open that you like each other, there’s unspoken pressure to “do something about it”, to start dating or something. A lot of times, that ruins things.